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Music: Who, New or a Monkey

Howzit fellows!

Heard something interesting last night when I watched “America’s Go Talent Season 4001” – a guy dressed up as a clown suit slandering Sharon Osbourne’s husband Ozzie. Oh yes, we never heard what he said but we know what she said when she rebuked him, if that’s the word.   Yes Sharon, good for you.  When I was still a monkey in the ’70s the only guy that counted was Ozzy. The only group that counted was Sabbath. My older brother was a lover of Deep Purple, his mate was into the American group Grandfunk Railroad and frankly I loved them all. Kids nowadays don’t know what lead to what and why we have Metallica, a group that stamps the signature on most modern heavy rock . Is it heavy rock nowadays? I’m not pedantic and I really don’t care. Ozzy did it for me. I have Sabbath’s “Last Supper” on DVD. Brilliant musos, old and new, but all Ozzy. 

Disturbance = Reality Check * Brainwash

Nowadays, frankly I am disturbed.  Old Blues is still the Best Blues. Do we really have modern talent or a load of spin doctors. Ten years ago I had a serious argument with my belated brother in law (loved you Piet – may God bless your soul) about music. I was fortunate in that that there were only three people in the argument and none of them was as arrogant as myself. My argument is and will always be that a good marketing stint through a good attorney will do the job for you. Why?  How much rubbish can a man really handle – if a girl is seriously sexy she will get the job whether she can sing or not. Umm, except for Ms Paris).  Britney – I used to see some sexy legs when she was oh’ so younger.  She is no comparison in my eyes to Mariah, the C.  Flashing your  crotch (The Big B) is great for publicity but not so much for your singing career if your market is 40 or 50 years olds with daughters coming into puberty.  But Britney is not that – she is marketing.  But alas, she has won the appeal again of millions. Orchestrated? Yes. By whom? 

Let’s look at Madona, that sexy wench from Michigan ( I stand corrected). Why do I like Madonna? What made me like Madonna? I’m a 4 000 year old man. Well, it’s all in the style and publicity – she is self made. I have read so  many books about Madonna, whether factual or a professional opinion, that I too would like to write a book. Listen, this girl is 50 and if I could spend an evening with her, not through the learning agonies of the karma sutra but getting to know her. I bet you she is ruthless, gorgeous and has talent, besides huge physical presence that any person would admire. Sexual… sure. Promiscuous…. the books said so. Marketing genius? Bang On.  She never was a brilliant dancer. She never was a brilliant  singer.  But combine the two and you have brilliance.  Michael Jackson? Et tu Brute (media). Marketing genius and stunning entertainer. Madonna and Michael Jackson are self made and hugely talented. I see Madonna as a person with enormous drive and stage personality. Michael Jackson? One of our best over the last 100 years.  With Elvis, Beatles, Rolling Stones, Golden Earring, Grand Funk and Deep Purple. Did I mention The Doobie Brothers, U2, Dire Straits, Crosby, Stills, Nash, Young and the millions of other groups I cannot think of others right now. Life has become a fortress for me – I need to get all the old music , listen and become deranged. Madonna and M.J. belong there. And yes, the group Live.

Now that I have mention 99% white artists how about modern black artists, like Beyonce and Rihana. What a joke. They are gorgeous, beautiful and what unbelievable talent. Notice they are both young and beautiful. Does white rock compare to black rock. Some of our world’s best rock artists have been black. Our best guitarists are black (according to Rolling Stone and myself, the arrogant self). Mark Knopfler excluded here.

Me, right now I want to hear Tracy Chapman, Mark Knopfler, Bob Marley, Madonna, Rihana, Santana, Hendrix, Brian May and a load of others.

I think stars born overnight are the ones to avoid.  Madonna and Jackson worked hard to get where they are or were today.  But no, that’s not the only reason – they have or had genuine talent .  Anybody can pick up a guitar and strum a few chords but think of the package. Right now America has Talent has people that strum chords and some that will not only strum chords – they will play the way into your heart. Like the Chicken Farmer. That wasn’t just talent – that was brilliant marketing although I don’t think this highly talented artist even knew he was marketing himself in the beginning but being just a humble chicken farmer. Like one of the world’s biggest rock stars being a grave digger. Maybe only for one day.

Tracey Chapman didn’t win an Idols competition. Get her music to prove why most modern “artists” should not be played on the radio or worse still downloaded illegally from YT. Neither Dire Straits.

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